Calm the tweeting you big Twit. (that was a complement)

You know what i don't like? Twitter.

People are going crazy over this thinger, and I don't get it. Are they just super psyched that they can, in great detail (or as much detail as you can fit into 140 characters or less), chronicle their life as it occurs? Yes I think that must be it. People can't go around announcing to everyone their life's story, so Twitter is the next best thing.

But I will never get it. No sir, not I. I do not want to be a tweeting twit or whatever they're called.

I mean really, do I ever need to let people know what I'm doing at all moments of the day? No.

Maybe if I was doing something worth updating people on every five minutes like fighting an epic battle in Antarctica against rabid penguins or sky diving from the International Space Station (which wouldn't work, I know....but could you just imagine?) I would get it, but as it is all I'd have to put up is "shit, my prof's mic isn't working again and I can't hear her tiny mouse voice because I'm not sitting in the front row" or "bkdwiuf I'm drunk and Metric is whoaaaa awesomeee..." or "at this point, ALL I WANT OUT OF LIFE IS TO RIDE THE NEW DOUBLE DECKER BUSES THAT ARE CRUISING THE TRANSIT SYSTEM!" (which is so true...). Shit like that.

So I stay away from it, so as not to get addicted to yet another dumb internet thing...like Facebook, or fmylife.com, or this....I have room for only one more addiction in my life an I intend for that to be crack. Just kidding kids. Don't do drugs. Ok, maybe just marijuana, but only a bit.

Could you imagine if there was something like Twitter around in the Middle Ages? Or the French Revolution? Or various other times in history where this technology has no business being?

O My giddy God, that would have been so fucking hilarious.....seriously picture it:


Hey there! KingLouisXVI is using Twitter.

guess they weren't kidding.
11:43 PM July 14th 1789 from Web

just realized my country is planning to storm the Bastille by reading the ParisMob twitter page. C'est une blague? Oui je pense.
7:56 PM July 13th 1789 from Web

maybe I should stop taxing the shit out of poor people....nah.
8:43 AM July 12th 1789 from Web

person in charge of handing me underwear gave me the uncomfortable pair + found rooms i never knew about in Versailles.
3:23 PM July 11th 1789 from Web

apparently food is short in Paris. Marie just told some whiners to got eat cake. FUCK YA!
5:54 PM July 8th 1789 from Web

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Ok I had way too much fun doing that, and I've accidentally let you all see how much of a nerd I am. (I use the term "you all" very loosely).

Now I should probably get off this and do something constructive with my life, like all the 10 more pages of an essay have to finish. But I don't want to. I'll get the shakes and start twitching and have all the classic signs of withdrawal.

Plus history essays about women suffrage in Canada aren't the most interesting things to write.

GAH.
Must.. rip. self ...away... from. blogge...