I'm going to attempt to mend a bridge over coffee tonight that I somehow burned the fuck down last month. I'm not even sure why it went up in flames....I set such a small fire (translation: what I did wasn't even all that bad, but whatevs).
I apologized and everything quite some time ago, but these two self-proclaimed non-grudge holders are really really hanging on to this grudge. There are some other people who are pissed at me for some reason or another, and if I may let the bitch in me out for a moment, whatever I did to them (and I can't actually remember because I was quite intoxicated) they had it coming. Trust me, they soooo did.
I'm not vindictive, but they really pissed me off.
I'm kind of wondering now if it's even worth it to try and repair these friendships....this particular group of friends is quite judgmental sometimes and it drives me a tad up the wall. O well, we shall see, won't we?
Anyhoo, bridges are stupid. Who builds a bridge for a relationship anyways? Really, if you want it to last, make a goddamn road.
Monday, June 8, 2009
My music at Work
If I was a rock star, I would be a cross between Emily Haines, Elton John, and a Tickle Me Elmo on crack. I would sing like Emily (not really but a girl can dream can't she?), dress like Elton (sometimes) and go nuts like an Elmo (always).
I would also just in general be like David Bowie. Freak out in a moonage daydream, ooooo yeah.
I reserve the right to change my mind about what kind of hybrid rock star I would be at any time.
You could probably throw some Viking into the mix too.
I would wear horns.
I would also just in general be like David Bowie. Freak out in a moonage daydream, ooooo yeah.
I reserve the right to change my mind about what kind of hybrid rock star I would be at any time.
You could probably throw some Viking into the mix too.
I would wear horns.
Sunday, June 7, 2009
Sleep evades me
I am bored and I can't sleep. I can't write. I can't even play the piano because that would wake up everyone in my house.
And my friend just drunk IMed me saying she got back from a "mini ewr ofehtger" (translation: a mini get together), and it was "sicjjjjj" (meaning "sick") and that she wishes that a friend of hers (not me) had have been there.
O great. Thank you so much for telling me all about a party you didn't invite me to, and then wishing that some person was there. It's so nice of you to take five minutes between getting home and passing out to tell me what I missed.
Fuck life in general.
I'm going ot get the wine out of my closet.
I am literally a closet alcoholic ahahaha.
Just kidding.
But not really.
But really.
But not.
And my friend just drunk IMed me saying she got back from a "mini ewr ofehtger" (translation: a mini get together), and it was "sicjjjjj" (meaning "sick") and that she wishes that a friend of hers (not me) had have been there.
O great. Thank you so much for telling me all about a party you didn't invite me to, and then wishing that some person was there. It's so nice of you to take five minutes between getting home and passing out to tell me what I missed.
Fuck life in general.
I'm going ot get the wine out of my closet.
I am literally a closet alcoholic ahahaha.
Just kidding.
But not really.
But really.
But not.
Saturday, June 6, 2009
So what does THAT mean?
I'm on a bit* of a Lady GaGa kick these days. Consequently, my ten year old brother is too. He always seems to pick up on my musical obsessions and take them on himself. Like with Alanis Morissette, Neil Young, that song by Sublime "Wrong Way," Metric, Johnny Cash, Elton John..... MJ's "Billy Jean" and a whole lot more.
So lately he's been prancing around the house singing "Boys Boys Boys," a song off GaGa's album The Fame. Here is a sample of the lyrics:
I like you a lot LOT
Think you're really hot HOT....
Boys boys boys
We like boys in cars
Boys boys boys
Buy us drinks in bars...
And so on. This coming from a boy who says, and I quote "My first priority is girls, my second is getting in shape to impress them." Alas, I find him a child of many contradictions haha.
I mostly just get a kick out of him liking the music I like (and sometimes he learns the songs just from hearing me sing them at home), but not only does he run around the house (and everywhere else) singing these songs, he also asks me questions about them. And when the artist has an album full of mature (or immature, depending on how you look at it) content, the questions can be hilariously awkward at best, and bordering-on-corrupting-his-mind at worst.
They can be really specific too...
[line from Metric's Succexy: "Every ten year old enemy soldier thinks falling bombs are shooting stars, sometimes, but she doesn't make wishes on them."]
Brother: Why would a bomb be like a shooting star and why is an enemy soldier only ten years old? What does Succexy mean?
Valid questions and easy to answer. And he's not one of those kids who asks questions and then doesn't care about the answer. He actually listens, so I can get all philosophical and whatnot, something that if I do with other people, it drives them up the wall.
{EDIT: That line is actually from Metric's IOU . My mistake. Both songs are really good.}
[line from Lady Gaga's Paparazzi: "We're plastic but we still have fun."]
Brother: What does she mean by plastic people having fun?
Again, not an awkward question. Easily dealt with.
Me: Well, she means that she is fake, people are fake and have fake personalities when they go out to clubs and so on they just put on a mask and... no not a real mask, a figurative mask.... and on some superficial level, it's all still fun.
Brother: O I thought it meant people with plastic surgery.
Me: Sure that too.
But then his little ears begin to pick out words and phrases he is not familiar with and he starts asking for definitions...
[line from LG's Pokerface: "...'Cause I'm bluffin' with my muffin"]
Brother: Sister, what's a muffin?
Not quite so easy anymore. But I decide it's better for him to know what it really means, so he doesn't get up in front of his class and sing that song, because, trust me, he would totally do that kind of thing. He's the biggest drama queen I've ever met.
Me: It's a vagina.
Brother: (uncontrolable laughter). So how do you lie with a.... that thing?
Me: I dunno. She just doesn't love the guy I guess. (This is not exactly what it means, but I wasn't about to get into the whole thing when she said she thought of women when she slept with her old boyfriend.)
Brother: O ok. (thoughtful pause) Is she a prostitute?
Me: No. Well...no.
So my parents weren't too pleased with me divulging that kind of information to my brother. I could tell by the look on their faces (slightly aghast with eyes oogling like pairs of googly eyes), since they were sitting in the same room as us. So next time I got a question like that, I censored myself.
[line from LG's LoveGame: "I wanna take a ride on your disco stick."]
Brother: What's a disco stick?
Me: It's umm... this cane-like stick that Lady Gaga has that has a light-up crystal on the end and she uses it during her shows as a prop. She um.. dances with it.
That wasn't even a lie. She has a stick like that, but that is most definitely not what she is talking about in the song. But my dad was in the car with us when the question was asked, and he was wearing that look on his face like "dear Godddd....why does this music exist?" so I thought I would filter my words for his benefit.
At least my father has the good sense not to say something like "O this pop music will never last." He learned from his dad's mistake. As a child he was told that this Rock and Roll business will fade out as sure as anything, and that people will be listening to Hank Williams long after Rock has died and been forgotten. (To which I answer, who is Hank Williams?)
*slight understatement
So lately he's been prancing around the house singing "Boys Boys Boys," a song off GaGa's album The Fame. Here is a sample of the lyrics:
I like you a lot LOT
Think you're really hot HOT....
Boys boys boys
We like boys in cars
Boys boys boys
Buy us drinks in bars...
And so on. This coming from a boy who says, and I quote "My first priority is girls, my second is getting in shape to impress them." Alas, I find him a child of many contradictions haha.
I mostly just get a kick out of him liking the music I like (and sometimes he learns the songs just from hearing me sing them at home), but not only does he run around the house (and everywhere else) singing these songs, he also asks me questions about them. And when the artist has an album full of mature (or immature, depending on how you look at it) content, the questions can be hilariously awkward at best, and bordering-on-corrupting-his-mind at worst.
They can be really specific too...
[line from Metric's Succexy: "Every ten year old enemy soldier thinks falling bombs are shooting stars, sometimes, but she doesn't make wishes on them."]
Brother: Why would a bomb be like a shooting star and why is an enemy soldier only ten years old? What does Succexy mean?
Valid questions and easy to answer. And he's not one of those kids who asks questions and then doesn't care about the answer. He actually listens, so I can get all philosophical and whatnot, something that if I do with other people, it drives them up the wall.
{EDIT: That line is actually from Metric's IOU . My mistake. Both songs are really good.}
[line from Lady Gaga's Paparazzi: "We're plastic but we still have fun."]
Brother: What does she mean by plastic people having fun?
Again, not an awkward question. Easily dealt with.
Me: Well, she means that she is fake, people are fake and have fake personalities when they go out to clubs and so on they just put on a mask and... no not a real mask, a figurative mask.... and on some superficial level, it's all still fun.
Brother: O I thought it meant people with plastic surgery.
Me: Sure that too.
But then his little ears begin to pick out words and phrases he is not familiar with and he starts asking for definitions...
[line from LG's Pokerface: "...'Cause I'm bluffin' with my muffin"]
Brother: Sister, what's a muffin?
Not quite so easy anymore. But I decide it's better for him to know what it really means, so he doesn't get up in front of his class and sing that song, because, trust me, he would totally do that kind of thing. He's the biggest drama queen I've ever met.
Me: It's a vagina.
Brother: (uncontrolable laughter). So how do you lie with a.... that thing?
Me: I dunno. She just doesn't love the guy I guess. (This is not exactly what it means, but I wasn't about to get into the whole thing when she said she thought of women when she slept with her old boyfriend.)
Brother: O ok. (thoughtful pause) Is she a prostitute?
Me: No. Well...no.
So my parents weren't too pleased with me divulging that kind of information to my brother. I could tell by the look on their faces (slightly aghast with eyes oogling like pairs of googly eyes), since they were sitting in the same room as us. So next time I got a question like that, I censored myself.
[line from LG's LoveGame: "I wanna take a ride on your disco stick."]
Brother: What's a disco stick?
Me: It's umm... this cane-like stick that Lady Gaga has that has a light-up crystal on the end and she uses it during her shows as a prop. She um.. dances with it.
That wasn't even a lie. She has a stick like that, but that is most definitely not what she is talking about in the song. But my dad was in the car with us when the question was asked, and he was wearing that look on his face like "dear Godddd....why does this music exist?" so I thought I would filter my words for his benefit.
At least my father has the good sense not to say something like "O this pop music will never last." He learned from his dad's mistake. As a child he was told that this Rock and Roll business will fade out as sure as anything, and that people will be listening to Hank Williams long after Rock has died and been forgotten. (To which I answer, who is Hank Williams?)
*slight understatement
Thursday, June 4, 2009
I am the Scientist.
Today, I ventured out of the office, away from lists and carbohydrate pamphlet designing, and into the lab! The real lab, where they boil water for more than making just coffee and instead of mini-fridges with half-eaten, slightly rotten lunches in them, there are massive, -80 degrees Celsius freezers with live cell cultures in them (I think).
I got to run the High Performance Liquid Chromatography (HPLC) thinger, which is kinda like a big, ubber expensive sifter, except instead of panning for gold, you're trying to get a particular pure product out of a mix of other byproducts of your reaction. And instead of a pan it's a metal column with silica gel inside that separtates different things blah blah blah.... ok so it's really nothing like panning for gold, because panning for gold would be more interesting. At least there would be fish in the river. There are no fish in the HPLC. I hope.
[Click on the link for a description of HPLC that may or may not make more sense than the gibberish I just spouted]
So instead of starring at my computer screen in the office, I starred at the computer screen in the lab, watching the progression of the HPLC. Mesmerizing stuff, it really is. It is pretty much like watching a line graph slowly forming across the screen. Whenever the line formed a peek, I had to collect the solution coming out of it in a test tube. I dunno what it was.
When it was all collected, I got to FREEZE DRY it. Like astronaut food. Except if you ate whatever it was that I freeze dried, I'm not sure, but you might die.
I got to run the High Performance Liquid Chromatography (HPLC) thinger, which is kinda like a big, ubber expensive sifter, except instead of panning for gold, you're trying to get a particular pure product out of a mix of other byproducts of your reaction. And instead of a pan it's a metal column with silica gel inside that separtates different things blah blah blah.... ok so it's really nothing like panning for gold, because panning for gold would be more interesting. At least there would be fish in the river. There are no fish in the HPLC. I hope.
[Click on the link for a description of HPLC that may or may not make more sense than the gibberish I just spouted]
So instead of starring at my computer screen in the office, I starred at the computer screen in the lab, watching the progression of the HPLC. Mesmerizing stuff, it really is. It is pretty much like watching a line graph slowly forming across the screen. Whenever the line formed a peek, I had to collect the solution coming out of it in a test tube. I dunno what it was.
When it was all collected, I got to FREEZE DRY it. Like astronaut food. Except if you ate whatever it was that I freeze dried, I'm not sure, but you might die.
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
I am banging my head against the wall for Two reasons:
the friction keeps my head warm, and I am bored like a bored thing on boredom tablets.
I am at work, "working" but mostly just freezing my ass off. It is so cold in this "building." It is my belief that it is really a fridge masquerading as an office building. I also believe that if I ever use quotation marks in speaking like I just used them above, I will punch myself in the face.
The people who control the climate in this place need to turn off the AC. Haven't they realized that June has come but the heat has failed to come with it? Seriously. This is like living through the longest March of my life, followed by a never ending April.
It is so cold in here that I need to periodically take walks through the halls just to get my blood to circulate properly. It is so cold I make coffee 17 times a day just so I can hold a warm mug. It is so cold, the temperature is inducing hibernation....I feel like I've died and they decided to cryogenically freeze me.
They say an uncomfortable work environment makes people more productive (or at least Better Off Ted says that) but I am here to say that is false. Sooooo false. Look at me. I'm so uncomfortable, I've decided to proclaim it through the internets, and the amount of time I spend meandering through the corridors must add up to the equivalent of several lunch breaks, not to mention the amount of coffee I'm drinking makes me a complete spaz and induces a severe form of ADHD. And also -
O MY GOSH there are so many chemicals on this list! It NEVER ENDS. Well, actually, it just did. I finished it. For the past few days I've been making a table of generic drug names and their chemical structures. It was tedious and long and sososososoooo boring. On the bright side, I now know that Viagra is actually Sildenafil citrate and it looks like this:
I am at work, "working" but mostly just freezing my ass off. It is so cold in this "building." It is my belief that it is really a fridge masquerading as an office building. I also believe that if I ever use quotation marks in speaking like I just used them above, I will punch myself in the face.
The people who control the climate in this place need to turn off the AC. Haven't they realized that June has come but the heat has failed to come with it? Seriously. This is like living through the longest March of my life, followed by a never ending April.
It is so cold in here that I need to periodically take walks through the halls just to get my blood to circulate properly. It is so cold I make coffee 17 times a day just so I can hold a warm mug. It is so cold, the temperature is inducing hibernation....I feel like I've died and they decided to cryogenically freeze me.
They say an uncomfortable work environment makes people more productive (or at least Better Off Ted says that) but I am here to say that is false. Sooooo false. Look at me. I'm so uncomfortable, I've decided to proclaim it through the internets, and the amount of time I spend meandering through the corridors must add up to the equivalent of several lunch breaks, not to mention the amount of coffee I'm drinking makes me a complete spaz and induces a severe form of ADHD. And also -
O MY GOSH there are so many chemicals on this list! It NEVER ENDS. Well, actually, it just did. I finished it. For the past few days I've been making a table of generic drug names and their chemical structures. It was tedious and long and sososososoooo boring. On the bright side, I now know that Viagra is actually Sildenafil citrate and it looks like this:
It doesn't look very blue to me....
I wonder what boredom tables would look like.......
Edit: And when I say "tables" I mean tablets.
I wonder what boredom tables would look like.......
Edit: And when I say "tables" I mean tablets.
Monday, June 1, 2009
Merry Jolly Fucking Christmas
My new favourite Christmas song. Nevermind that it is nowhere near Christmas... this song can be listened to at any time of the year.
I'm not sure, but something about the song tells me it's not actually about Christmas.... something in the way GaGa says "Ho Ho Ho" makes me think she's not referring to the jolly laugh of a giant bearded man in red who sneaks into your house at night and eats your food.
I'm not sure, but something about the song tells me it's not actually about Christmas.... something in the way GaGa says "Ho Ho Ho" makes me think she's not referring to the jolly laugh of a giant bearded man in red who sneaks into your house at night and eats your food.
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