Reality's got Nothin' on Fiction.

You can tell it's summer by the fact that there is nothing to watch on le tele. (In fact that's the only way you can tell these days, since the weather is manic and seems to think it's fall.) So I'll be casting around for something to watch....you know, some dumb, mind-numbing show, because most of my regular shows are on hiatus, but all there is are reality shows.

Ok, I said something mind numbing not mind murdering so that I have to go on a respirator and so on. Sadly, that is what happens when I only find shows like The Whor - er, pardon me, The Bachelor (or The Bachelorette as the case may be), Canada's Next Top Model and Big Brother (is it on every night?).

What's with reality TV taking over the world? Did they have it back at the dawn of television in the umm...20s?.... or was that when the TV was invented and then it really started to catch on in the 50s? I dunno...whatevs.....shows you how much I paid attention in "History and Philosophy of Journalism*." No I think this reality TV bullocks is a new phenomenon. Except there was that one reality thing back in the day....I think it was call Gosh Darn It the TV is Broken, Now I have to Interact with my Family. That show is still running today actually.

Not all reality shows are bad I guess. I quite enjoy So You Think You Can Dance. Canada version or otherwise. I just can't stand Mary Murphy and the way she screams every 17 seconds. It is mildly amusing though, since her face doesn't really move because she eats Botox for breakfast.

Speaking of TV, the Much Music Video Awards (MMVAs) are coming up on the 21st. On the 13th, Much Music starts giving out wrists bands to get into the audience. Midday today, people (I'm guessing those who are members of the Cult of the Jonas Brothers. They are co-hosting. Ick-o-rama) began lining up in downtown Toronto to get them. Really hardcore people with couches and tents and games to pass the time.

I was debating going down to Toronto to get a wristband, because Lady Gaga is performing. That thought lasted about seven seconds, from the start of the MMVAs commercial until the point when they jubilantly announced that the Jonas Hoes would be there. Not even for Lady Gaga could I fathom subjecting myself to an evening of those purity ring wearing posers and their teeny-bopper fanatics. I'd puke. Or die.

I'd totally wait in line for a day and night if it weren't for those Jonas Hoes being there. It would be like camping out in the city. In downtown Toronto. Slightly scarier than camping in Ottawa, but much less scary than camping in say, New York City. Hey, you know what the difference between camping in the wild and camping in New York is? Well in the wild you need bear spray, and in NYC, you need a gun.




*without a doubt the most useless, required waste of my life, EVER. I think the goal of the prof was to prepare us should we ever in our future journalism careers find ourselves transported through time and space back to ANY other era....we'd know the hot methode of communication of the day and would be able to seamlessly continue our jobs despite being in the middle of Renaissance Italy [printing press WOOT] or Prehistoric Anywhere [grunts and clubs YAY] or 14th century North America [smoke signals and "the oral tradition"]